My favorite local weather experts have declared that winter is (finally) officially over as of today. I happen to love winter, but it had its turn and now I am ready for spring. In celebration of the season's arrival, here are some of my favorite things!
The Five BEST Things about Spring
1. Baseball! 'Nuff said.
2. Easter candy (I really should have bought stock in Cadbury a long time ago...)
3. New life, from the buds on the trees to the flowers and grass, and also all the adorable baby animals that are born this time of year.
4. Outdoor activities: picnics, hikes, campouts, and of course lots of RUNNING!
5. My darling daughter, born on April 9th last year. Celebrating her entrance into this world will now be one of my favorite things to do every Spring!
Of course, it's not all sunshine and fuzzy bunnies, so I will be fair and honest.
The Five WORST Things about Spring
1. Bees
2. Pollen
3. Dark mornings, for now
4. Pollen
5. Rain (except when it washes away some of the POLLEN!)
Happy Spring, everyone! I'm off to take some Benadryl with a Cadbury Creme egg chaser...
Friday, March 28, 2014
Tuesday, March 25, 2014
Still Falling Short {Weekly Summary}
Total # of Workouts: 2
Total # of Runs: 2
Longest run without walking (time): 12 minutes
Highest total running mileage in one day: approx. 2.0 miles
Total running mileage for the week: approx. 3.8 miles
Fastest speed sustained over a mile: approx. 5 mph (12 min mile)
Progress on training plans: I'm still on day 9 of my "30-day" ab challenge. I am almost done with week 5 of the 5K training plan that I'm somewhat following.
Progress on safety goals: Started researching self-defense classes.
Injury Report: No injuries, but I've been fighting this sinus gunk for over 2 weeks now. Some days are better than others. I had sinus congestion headaches for 5 days straight. Sometimes I can fight through the symptoms and exercise anyway, but sometimes the symptoms win.
Weight: 226
Weekly Change: -1
Overall Change: -4 from starting weight of 230
BMI: 32.9 (obese)
Jean Size: 20
Waist Circumference: Have not measured lately
Next Goal Weight: My first goal is just to stay under 230 for a whole month. Just one week left in March and I'm well under 230!
Next event goal: None yet.
Last week's goals: (1) Incomplete: I ran only two times. (2) Incomplete: I did zero ab workouts. (3) Incomplete: I wrote only two blog posts.
This week's goals: (1) Run 3 times. (2) Do 3 ab workouts. (3) Write 3 or more blog posts, including this one.
Analysis: Wow. I was not expecting to be writing an update like this. I really thought this was going to be the week when I finally managed to run three times, and I thought for sure I'd be able to keep up the ab workouts. Instead, life got in the way, like it loves to do. I don't want to sit here and make a million excuses. It was an incredibly busy week but I should have made that third run happen somehow. And I need to stop using my sinus congestion as an excuse not to even try to do ab workouts. I need to do better this week. It's going to be hard, because I've already gotten off to a lousy start. Luckily, I can do hard things. I've got this. My next weekly summary will be very different than this one.
Total # of Runs: 2
Longest run without walking (time): 12 minutes
Highest total running mileage in one day: approx. 2.0 miles
Total running mileage for the week: approx. 3.8 miles
Fastest speed sustained over a mile: approx. 5 mph (12 min mile)
Progress on training plans: I'm still on day 9 of my "30-day" ab challenge. I am almost done with week 5 of the 5K training plan that I'm somewhat following.
Progress on safety goals: Started researching self-defense classes.
Injury Report: No injuries, but I've been fighting this sinus gunk for over 2 weeks now. Some days are better than others. I had sinus congestion headaches for 5 days straight. Sometimes I can fight through the symptoms and exercise anyway, but sometimes the symptoms win.
Weight: 226
Weekly Change: -1
Overall Change: -4 from starting weight of 230
BMI: 32.9 (obese)
Jean Size: 20
Waist Circumference: Have not measured lately
Next Goal Weight: My first goal is just to stay under 230 for a whole month. Just one week left in March and I'm well under 230!
Next event goal: None yet.
Last week's goals: (1) Incomplete: I ran only two times. (2) Incomplete: I did zero ab workouts. (3) Incomplete: I wrote only two blog posts.
This week's goals: (1) Run 3 times. (2) Do 3 ab workouts. (3) Write 3 or more blog posts, including this one.
Analysis: Wow. I was not expecting to be writing an update like this. I really thought this was going to be the week when I finally managed to run three times, and I thought for sure I'd be able to keep up the ab workouts. Instead, life got in the way, like it loves to do. I don't want to sit here and make a million excuses. It was an incredibly busy week but I should have made that third run happen somehow. And I need to stop using my sinus congestion as an excuse not to even try to do ab workouts. I need to do better this week. It's going to be hard, because I've already gotten off to a lousy start. Luckily, I can do hard things. I've got this. My next weekly summary will be very different than this one.
Wednesday, March 19, 2014
Confessions of a (Former) Weather Wimp {Wordy Wednesday}
This has been quite a winter, and it's not over yet! Though my calendar clearly states that spring begins tomorrow, the 7-day forecast tells quite a different story. We're in for another cold snap next week, with the possibility of yet another winter storm!
But I'm not complaining. I'll be out there running whether we get snow or really really cold rain.
A pretty amazing phenomenon has occured over the past few months. It started before I got back into running, actually. When I was still taking the train to work each day, I discovered that I really enjoyed walking in the cold. I assure you this was not always the case.
I grew up in the South, but never cared much for the heat and humidity. Part of what drew me to the Mid-Atlantic area was the climate -- I love having 4 distinct seasons (even though in some years the temperatures fluctuate like a wild roller coaster rather than gradually increasing or decreasing the way they "should."). I even love winter, especially when it snows. However, the more extreme the temperatures, the more likely I was to complain and attempt to stay indoors.
This winter, we've experienced some unusual blasts of record-breaking cold (polar vortex, anyone?), with single-digit temps and wind chills well into negative numbers! I fully admit that on the very coldest days, I stayed warm and snug inside my house as much as possible. But somehow, experiencing that insane cold toughened me up enough to appreciate temps in the 20's and even the teens! What I used to consider too cold now has become pleasant -- the previously intolerable is now not only tolerable, but enjoyable!
The feeling carried over from walking outside to running. In weather that once would have driven me straight to my treadmill, I've gone out for fantastic frigid runs! My new favorite way to enjoy a snow day is to run down the freshly-plowed streets of my neighborhood, breathing in the crisp air while admiring the frosty beauty all around me. I still draw the line at negative wind chills, but for the most part cold is no longer a deterrent to an outdoor run.
I used to be content being a weather wimp. I was pretty honest with myself about it and knew what my limits were, and I tried to keep my complaints to a minimum as long as I wasn't forced to brave the elements. My husband got me a treadmill for my birthday a few years ago, and I was grateful to have a nice climate-controlled place to run on my wimpy days. I still appreciate having that option, but I don't think I will need it nearly as much as I once did.
Being less wimpy about weather has its benefits. For one, it makes me feel awesome, like I'm overcoming huge obstacles just by pushing myself out the door. I feel tough. For a moment, I might even feel invincible! Second, I think it will better prepare me for any races I choose to run in the future. The thing is, you can't control the conditions on race day. You might choose to train only on sunny, dry, moderate days, but you could wake up on race day to a cold rain or a heat wave. If you're already accustomed to running in a variety of conditions, some of them unpleasant, then the weather shouldn't throw you off your game even if it's not what you expected it would be.
Of course, it remains to be seen if the progress I've made with extreme cold will also translate to extreme heat. My wimpiness might rear its ugly head again this summer as the mercury rises. I hope it won't though, because I really like the idea of shedding one of my many weaknesses. I'd really like to think I'm making strides toward becoming a stronger person all around, and this is just the beginning.
But I'm not complaining. I'll be out there running whether we get snow or really really cold rain.
A pretty amazing phenomenon has occured over the past few months. It started before I got back into running, actually. When I was still taking the train to work each day, I discovered that I really enjoyed walking in the cold. I assure you this was not always the case.
I grew up in the South, but never cared much for the heat and humidity. Part of what drew me to the Mid-Atlantic area was the climate -- I love having 4 distinct seasons (even though in some years the temperatures fluctuate like a wild roller coaster rather than gradually increasing or decreasing the way they "should."). I even love winter, especially when it snows. However, the more extreme the temperatures, the more likely I was to complain and attempt to stay indoors.
This winter, we've experienced some unusual blasts of record-breaking cold (polar vortex, anyone?), with single-digit temps and wind chills well into negative numbers! I fully admit that on the very coldest days, I stayed warm and snug inside my house as much as possible. But somehow, experiencing that insane cold toughened me up enough to appreciate temps in the 20's and even the teens! What I used to consider too cold now has become pleasant -- the previously intolerable is now not only tolerable, but enjoyable!
The feeling carried over from walking outside to running. In weather that once would have driven me straight to my treadmill, I've gone out for fantastic frigid runs! My new favorite way to enjoy a snow day is to run down the freshly-plowed streets of my neighborhood, breathing in the crisp air while admiring the frosty beauty all around me. I still draw the line at negative wind chills, but for the most part cold is no longer a deterrent to an outdoor run.
I used to be content being a weather wimp. I was pretty honest with myself about it and knew what my limits were, and I tried to keep my complaints to a minimum as long as I wasn't forced to brave the elements. My husband got me a treadmill for my birthday a few years ago, and I was grateful to have a nice climate-controlled place to run on my wimpy days. I still appreciate having that option, but I don't think I will need it nearly as much as I once did.
Being less wimpy about weather has its benefits. For one, it makes me feel awesome, like I'm overcoming huge obstacles just by pushing myself out the door. I feel tough. For a moment, I might even feel invincible! Second, I think it will better prepare me for any races I choose to run in the future. The thing is, you can't control the conditions on race day. You might choose to train only on sunny, dry, moderate days, but you could wake up on race day to a cold rain or a heat wave. If you're already accustomed to running in a variety of conditions, some of them unpleasant, then the weather shouldn't throw you off your game even if it's not what you expected it would be.
Of course, it remains to be seen if the progress I've made with extreme cold will also translate to extreme heat. My wimpiness might rear its ugly head again this summer as the mercury rises. I hope it won't though, because I really like the idea of shedding one of my many weaknesses. I'd really like to think I'm making strides toward becoming a stronger person all around, and this is just the beginning.
Tuesday, March 18, 2014
Third Time's the Charm {Weekly Summary}
Total # of Workouts: 2
Total # of Runs: 2
Longest run without walking (time): 12 minutes
Highest total running mileage in one day: approx. 1.7 miles
Total running mileage for the week: approx. 3.2 miles
Fastest speed sustained over a mile: approx. 5 mph (12 min mile)
Progress on training plans: I'm still on day 9 of my "30-day" ab challenge. I finished week 4 of the 5K training plan that I'm somewhat following.
Progress on safety goals: Started researching self-defense classes.
Injury Report: Nothing to report.
Weight: 227
Weekly Change: N/A
Overall Change: -3 from new starting weight of 230
BMI: 33.0 (obese)
Jean Size: 20
Waist Circumference: Have not measured lately
Next Goal Weight: My first goal is just to stay under 230 for a whole month. Halfway through March and I'm still at 227 - I feel like I will be able to meet this goal!
Next event goal: None yet.
Last week's goals: (1) Incomplete: I ran only two times. (2) Complete: I did an ab workout! (3) Complete: I wrote two blog posts.
This week's goals: (1) Run 3 times. (2) Do 3 ab workouts. (3) Write 3 or more blog posts, including this one.
Analysis: I have mixed feelings about this week. I achieved 2/3 of my goals, but the one I failed to accomplish is the one that is most important to me. Somehow that third run per week remains elusive!! Getting started on any fitness plan is difficult, and one key to success is making exercise a habit. I know that once running is a regular part of my routine, it won't be as much of a struggle to find the time and energy. It will just be something that I do, no hesitation. As long as I'm only running two times per week, it doesn't feel frequent enough to be a habit. Each run is a challenge in terms of scheduling and also overcoming all the excuses I naturally make. I think that when running becomes a habit, it will be easier to focus on the quality of those runs, and on adding in various types of cross training. So I did adjust my new goals based on what I accomplished last week, but #1 is still the most important one to me. I've started off right with a Monday run, and hope to do my second one on Thursday, leaving both Saturday and Sunday options for the third run. Perhaps I will pop in and let you know if I manage to make it happen!
Total # of Runs: 2
Longest run without walking (time): 12 minutes
Highest total running mileage in one day: approx. 1.7 miles
Total running mileage for the week: approx. 3.2 miles
Fastest speed sustained over a mile: approx. 5 mph (12 min mile)
Progress on training plans: I'm still on day 9 of my "30-day" ab challenge. I finished week 4 of the 5K training plan that I'm somewhat following.
Progress on safety goals: Started researching self-defense classes.
Injury Report: Nothing to report.
Weight: 227
Weekly Change: N/A
Overall Change: -3 from new starting weight of 230
BMI: 33.0 (obese)
Jean Size: 20
Waist Circumference: Have not measured lately
Next Goal Weight: My first goal is just to stay under 230 for a whole month. Halfway through March and I'm still at 227 - I feel like I will be able to meet this goal!
Next event goal: None yet.
Last week's goals: (1) Incomplete: I ran only two times. (2) Complete: I did an ab workout! (3) Complete: I wrote two blog posts.
This week's goals: (1) Run 3 times. (2) Do 3 ab workouts. (3) Write 3 or more blog posts, including this one.
Analysis: I have mixed feelings about this week. I achieved 2/3 of my goals, but the one I failed to accomplish is the one that is most important to me. Somehow that third run per week remains elusive!! Getting started on any fitness plan is difficult, and one key to success is making exercise a habit. I know that once running is a regular part of my routine, it won't be as much of a struggle to find the time and energy. It will just be something that I do, no hesitation. As long as I'm only running two times per week, it doesn't feel frequent enough to be a habit. Each run is a challenge in terms of scheduling and also overcoming all the excuses I naturally make. I think that when running becomes a habit, it will be easier to focus on the quality of those runs, and on adding in various types of cross training. So I did adjust my new goals based on what I accomplished last week, but #1 is still the most important one to me. I've started off right with a Monday run, and hope to do my second one on Thursday, leaving both Saturday and Sunday options for the third run. Perhaps I will pop in and let you know if I manage to make it happen!
Tuesday, March 11, 2014
Self Defense/Martial Arts {Tuesday Tips}
Nearly two months have passed since I was assaulted, and I have done a lot of healing and strengthening. However, I don't necessarily feel any safer out in the world, so it's finally time to improve my self-defense skills. I've decided to accomplish this in two stages: (1) Learn quickly some very basic self-defense moves that can be applied in simple assault situations, and (2) Study some discipline of martial arts well enough to be able to handle myself in just about any attack scenario.
Stage 1 I think I can figure out on my own. I have a few leads on some people I can contact who can show me some moves -- I just need to get my butt in gear and DO IT already!
Stage 2 is where I need some help. I don't have a clue which discipline of martial arts I should study. There are so many options -- karate, taekwondo, Brazilian jiu-jitsu, just to name a few! I've only just begun to research them, and I don't trust myself to make a decision based on what I read online. I would love some advice from people who have firsthand knowledge of one or more disciplines.
Here are some basic facts about me that might help you guide me:
- I'm tall and fairly big-framed.
- I'm currently very overweight and out of shape, but I'm working on correcting that. :)
- Time and money are always limited in my world.
- I don't plan to compete and I'm not seeking out a spiritual experience.
- My primary interest is self defense and being able to neutralize threats quickly if necessary.
Please tell me what you think I should try, and why! Thanks!
Stage 1 I think I can figure out on my own. I have a few leads on some people I can contact who can show me some moves -- I just need to get my butt in gear and DO IT already!
Stage 2 is where I need some help. I don't have a clue which discipline of martial arts I should study. There are so many options -- karate, taekwondo, Brazilian jiu-jitsu, just to name a few! I've only just begun to research them, and I don't trust myself to make a decision based on what I read online. I would love some advice from people who have firsthand knowledge of one or more disciplines.
Here are some basic facts about me that might help you guide me:
- I'm tall and fairly big-framed.
- I'm currently very overweight and out of shape, but I'm working on correcting that. :)
- Time and money are always limited in my world.
- I don't plan to compete and I'm not seeking out a spiritual experience.
- My primary interest is self defense and being able to neutralize threats quickly if necessary.
Please tell me what you think I should try, and why! Thanks!
Monday, March 10, 2014
A Milestone, Literally {Weekly Summary}
Total # of Workouts: 3
Total # of Runs: 2
Longest run without walking (time): 12 minutes
Highest total running mileage in one day: approx. 1.5 miles
Total running mileage for the week: approx. 3 miles
Fastest speed sustained over a mile: approx. 5 mph (12 min mile)
Progress on training plans: I'm still on day 9 of my "30-day" ab challenge. I'm in week 4 of the 5K training plan that I'm somewhat following.
Progress on safety goals: Still slowly getting stronger and faster. Have not pursued self-defense classes yet.
Injury Report: Nothing to report.
Weight: 227
Weekly Change: -2
Overall Change: -3 from new starting weight of 230
BMI: 33.0 (obese)
Jean Size: 20
Waist Circumference: Have not measured lately
Next Goal Weight: My first goal is just to stay under 230 for a whole month. A week into March I'm at 227 - so far, so good!
Next event goal: None yet.
Last week's goals: (1) Incomplete: I ran only two times. (2) Incomplete: I did ZERO ab workouts. (3) Incomplete: I wrote only one blog post.
This week's goals: (1) Run 3 times. (2) Resume ab workouts. (3) Write 2 or more blog posts, including this one.
Analysis: Hmmm. I feel like I should be mad at myself for failing to meet any of my goals for the second week in a row. And yet, somehow I actually feel okay about it. One reason might be that I hit a signifcant milestone this week with my running: I ran a mile without stopping! Yay!! Another reason could be that I have failed so many times in recent memory to get an exercise routine going, and this time only running 2x per week feels like a real accomplishment! Yes, I do still want to make three runs per week the norm (and add in some cross training as well), but as long as I'm consistent with the two runs and not backtracking to one or fewer, I am pretty satisfied. I'm a little frustrated with myself for not resuming my ab workouts, but they are secondary to running so I just can't get too upset about it. To be perfectly honest, I'm most annoyed with myself for failing at goal #3! I really want to do more blogging, because writing is good for me in so many ways: not only does it keep me accountable with my fitness goals, but it also serves as therapy for whatever ails me mentally or emotionally, AND helps me hone my writing skills for future endeavors. So if I had to prioritize my goals for this week, they would go in this order: #3, #1, then #2. If a few days go by and you don't see another post, please yell at me! Thanks in advance. :)
Total # of Runs: 2
Longest run without walking (time): 12 minutes
Highest total running mileage in one day: approx. 1.5 miles
Total running mileage for the week: approx. 3 miles
Fastest speed sustained over a mile: approx. 5 mph (12 min mile)
Progress on training plans: I'm still on day 9 of my "30-day" ab challenge. I'm in week 4 of the 5K training plan that I'm somewhat following.
Progress on safety goals: Still slowly getting stronger and faster. Have not pursued self-defense classes yet.
Injury Report: Nothing to report.
Weight: 227
Weekly Change: -2
Overall Change: -3 from new starting weight of 230
BMI: 33.0 (obese)
Jean Size: 20
Waist Circumference: Have not measured lately
Next Goal Weight: My first goal is just to stay under 230 for a whole month. A week into March I'm at 227 - so far, so good!
Next event goal: None yet.
Last week's goals: (1) Incomplete: I ran only two times. (2) Incomplete: I did ZERO ab workouts. (3) Incomplete: I wrote only one blog post.
This week's goals: (1) Run 3 times. (2) Resume ab workouts. (3) Write 2 or more blog posts, including this one.
Analysis: Hmmm. I feel like I should be mad at myself for failing to meet any of my goals for the second week in a row. And yet, somehow I actually feel okay about it. One reason might be that I hit a signifcant milestone this week with my running: I ran a mile without stopping! Yay!! Another reason could be that I have failed so many times in recent memory to get an exercise routine going, and this time only running 2x per week feels like a real accomplishment! Yes, I do still want to make three runs per week the norm (and add in some cross training as well), but as long as I'm consistent with the two runs and not backtracking to one or fewer, I am pretty satisfied. I'm a little frustrated with myself for not resuming my ab workouts, but they are secondary to running so I just can't get too upset about it. To be perfectly honest, I'm most annoyed with myself for failing at goal #3! I really want to do more blogging, because writing is good for me in so many ways: not only does it keep me accountable with my fitness goals, but it also serves as therapy for whatever ails me mentally or emotionally, AND helps me hone my writing skills for future endeavors. So if I had to prioritize my goals for this week, they would go in this order: #3, #1, then #2. If a few days go by and you don't see another post, please yell at me! Thanks in advance. :)
Thursday, March 6, 2014
Ice Ice Baby {Belated Weekly Summary}
Total # of Workouts: 3
Total # of Runs: 2
Longest run without walking (time): 10 minutes
Highest total running mileage in one day: approx. 1.5 miles
Total running mileage for the week: approx. 2.8 miles
Fastest speed sustained over a mile: N/A
Progress on training plans: I'm still on day 9 of my "30-day" ab challenge. I'm in week 4 of the 5K training plan that I'm somewhat following.
Progress on safety goals: Still slowly getting stronger and faster. Have not pursued self-defense classes yet.
Injury Report: Nothing to report. I've had some soreness in my legs that makes me nervous, but it always goes away before the next run.
Weight: 229
Weekly Change: -2
Overall Change: -1 from new starting weight of 230
BMI: 33.3 (obese)
Jean Size: 20
Waist Circumference: Have not measured lately
Next Goal Weight: My first goal is just to stay under 230 for a whole month. I started March at 229 - so far, so good!
Next event goal: None yet.
Last week's goals: (1) Incomplete: I ran only two times. (2) Incomplete: I did ZERO ab workouts. (3) Incomplete: I wrote only one blog post.
This week's goals: (1) Run 3 times. (2) Resume ab workouts. (3) Write 2 or more blog posts, including this one.
Analysis: I don't know what happened with my ab workouts. I was on a roll, doing them fairly regularly and making good progress! My husband was joining me and it was fun to have the company and support. We were doing them at night right before bed, and I just started getting really tired at night and kept skipping, until suddenly more than a week had passed and I hadn't done a single core exercise! I really need to get back on track with that ASAP before I lose the strength I had built up. Fortunately I do know what happened with running...I missed my third run of the week because I was too sore from another exercise -- ice skating! My 8-year-old wanted to do something special with me (in lieu of the mother/son dance at his school), so we went ice skating together! I hadn't been on the ice in years, and I'd forgotten how much fun it was. We skated for nearly two full hours, and boy did I feel it the next day! I actually wasn't *quite* as sore as I'd expected to be, but my whole body was just exhausted. And it was totally worth it. :)
Total # of Runs: 2
Longest run without walking (time): 10 minutes
Highest total running mileage in one day: approx. 1.5 miles
Total running mileage for the week: approx. 2.8 miles
Fastest speed sustained over a mile: N/A
Progress on training plans: I'm still on day 9 of my "30-day" ab challenge. I'm in week 4 of the 5K training plan that I'm somewhat following.
Progress on safety goals: Still slowly getting stronger and faster. Have not pursued self-defense classes yet.
Injury Report: Nothing to report. I've had some soreness in my legs that makes me nervous, but it always goes away before the next run.
Weight: 229
Weekly Change: -2
Overall Change: -1 from new starting weight of 230
BMI: 33.3 (obese)
Jean Size: 20
Waist Circumference: Have not measured lately
Next Goal Weight: My first goal is just to stay under 230 for a whole month. I started March at 229 - so far, so good!
Next event goal: None yet.
Last week's goals: (1) Incomplete: I ran only two times. (2) Incomplete: I did ZERO ab workouts. (3) Incomplete: I wrote only one blog post.
This week's goals: (1) Run 3 times. (2) Resume ab workouts. (3) Write 2 or more blog posts, including this one.
Analysis: I don't know what happened with my ab workouts. I was on a roll, doing them fairly regularly and making good progress! My husband was joining me and it was fun to have the company and support. We were doing them at night right before bed, and I just started getting really tired at night and kept skipping, until suddenly more than a week had passed and I hadn't done a single core exercise! I really need to get back on track with that ASAP before I lose the strength I had built up. Fortunately I do know what happened with running...I missed my third run of the week because I was too sore from another exercise -- ice skating! My 8-year-old wanted to do something special with me (in lieu of the mother/son dance at his school), so we went ice skating together! I hadn't been on the ice in years, and I'd forgotten how much fun it was. We skated for nearly two full hours, and boy did I feel it the next day! I actually wasn't *quite* as sore as I'd expected to be, but my whole body was just exhausted. And it was totally worth it. :)
Monday, February 24, 2014
Slow Progress is Better Than No Progress {Weekly Summary}
Total # of Workouts: 2
Total # of Runs: 2
Longest run without walking (time): 9 minutes
Highest total running mileage in one day: approx. 1.25 miles
Total running mileage for the week: approx. 2.25 miles
Fastest speed sustained over a mile: N/A
Progress on training plans: I'm on day 9 of my 30-day ab challenge (which will probably end up taking me more like 90 days to complete). I'm in week 3 of the 5K training plan that I'm somewhat following.
Progress on safety goals: Still slowly getting stronger and faster. Have not pursued self-defense classes yet.
Injury Report: Nothing now. My cold was rough for a couple of days but it's already gone.
Weight: 231
Weekly Change: +2
Overall Change: +1 from new starting weight of 230
BMI: 33.6 (obese)
Jean Size: 20
Waist Circumference: Have not measured lately
Next Goal Weight: My first goal is just to stay under 230 for a whole month. I need to stop losing and gaining the same 2-4 pounds over and over again.
Next event goal: None yet.
Last week's goals: (1) Incomplete: I ran only 2 times. (2) Incomplete: I did only 2 ab workouts. (3) Complete! I wrote a second post last week!
This week's goals: (1) Run 3 times. (2) Do at least 5 ab workouts. (3) Write 3 or more blog posts, including this one.
Analysis: Naturally I'm frustrated not to have achieved all three of my goals for the week, but at least I came close. If I hadn't had a cold, I might have done more! I just need to keep showing up, keep trying, and never quit. Soon I will have more wins than losses when it comes to meeting my goals. I don't really have anything else to say about this week, though I do have ideas for more posts. Hopefully I will be back here again soon!
Total # of Runs: 2
Longest run without walking (time): 9 minutes
Highest total running mileage in one day: approx. 1.25 miles
Total running mileage for the week: approx. 2.25 miles
Fastest speed sustained over a mile: N/A
Progress on training plans: I'm on day 9 of my 30-day ab challenge (which will probably end up taking me more like 90 days to complete). I'm in week 3 of the 5K training plan that I'm somewhat following.
Progress on safety goals: Still slowly getting stronger and faster. Have not pursued self-defense classes yet.
Injury Report: Nothing now. My cold was rough for a couple of days but it's already gone.
Weight: 231
Weekly Change: +2
Overall Change: +1 from new starting weight of 230
BMI: 33.6 (obese)
Jean Size: 20
Waist Circumference: Have not measured lately
Next Goal Weight: My first goal is just to stay under 230 for a whole month. I need to stop losing and gaining the same 2-4 pounds over and over again.
Next event goal: None yet.
Last week's goals: (1) Incomplete: I ran only 2 times. (2) Incomplete: I did only 2 ab workouts. (3) Complete! I wrote a second post last week!
This week's goals: (1) Run 3 times. (2) Do at least 5 ab workouts. (3) Write 3 or more blog posts, including this one.
Analysis: Naturally I'm frustrated not to have achieved all three of my goals for the week, but at least I came close. If I hadn't had a cold, I might have done more! I just need to keep showing up, keep trying, and never quit. Soon I will have more wins than losses when it comes to meeting my goals. I don't really have anything else to say about this week, though I do have ideas for more posts. Hopefully I will be back here again soon!
Thursday, February 20, 2014
Silence is Deafening
Once upon a time, I was addicted to listening to music while running. So addicted, in fact, that a last-second decision to run without my ipod in my first 5K helped contribute to my complete breakdown in the race. After that, I tried forcing myself to run without music every once in a while, just so I could do it if I ever needed to again.
Things are different now. I am different now.
Even though I was always careful with my music -- volume low enough and only one ear bud in so I could still hear sounds around me -- being assaulted has caused me to obsess about situational awareness. I didn't really do anything "wrong" in that situation, but still I feel compelled to be even more aware, to the point of hypervigilance.
And so I no longer run with music when I'm outside.
The downside of the silence is that I'm forced to spend all that time inside my own head. As I've shown many times before, that can be a dangerous place for me. I have to dig much deeper to push through my natural inclination to quit when the going gets tough. I also have to face all the demons that lurk inside me.
My head has been an even scarier place of late, full of dark and depressing thoughts. Some of these thoughts are directly related to the psychological trauma I experienced, but many others are only related because the experience has brought them to the forefront of my mind. I've taken stock of my life and been confronted with abandoned dreams, unfulfilled hopes, and a great deal of frustration and disappointment with who I've become and how my life has turned out thus far.
Ultimately, I think it's good for me to face these demons. I am bolstered by a homily I heard at mass recently, about how we shouldn't be afraid to suffer. Suffering unites us to Christ on the cross, and purifies us, much like precious metals are purified in a refinery. I would not do the homily justice if I tried to explain it further, but it really resonated with me and encouraged me not to escape or dull any of the pain I'm enduring.
If I were to try to fill my head with music instead of thoughts, then my running would be an escape -- I'd be running away from the pain. Instead, I need to run to it, and through it. This reminds me of the popular children's song/book, "Going on a Bear Hunt" -- with each obstacle they face on their journey, they discover they can't go over it or under it, so they have to go through it.
I must face all of the obstacles in my head the same way -- the recent trauma and the other issues alike. I can't block them out with music. I can't dull them with alcohol (and thankfully I haven't really been too tempted to try). At some point I'll have to stop trying to escape them by emotional eating, but I'm not *quite* ready yet.
I can't go over them. I can't go under them. I have to go through them. And with every prayer I utter, every word I type here, and every silent step that I run, I am.
Things are different now. I am different now.
Even though I was always careful with my music -- volume low enough and only one ear bud in so I could still hear sounds around me -- being assaulted has caused me to obsess about situational awareness. I didn't really do anything "wrong" in that situation, but still I feel compelled to be even more aware, to the point of hypervigilance.
And so I no longer run with music when I'm outside.
The downside of the silence is that I'm forced to spend all that time inside my own head. As I've shown many times before, that can be a dangerous place for me. I have to dig much deeper to push through my natural inclination to quit when the going gets tough. I also have to face all the demons that lurk inside me.
My head has been an even scarier place of late, full of dark and depressing thoughts. Some of these thoughts are directly related to the psychological trauma I experienced, but many others are only related because the experience has brought them to the forefront of my mind. I've taken stock of my life and been confronted with abandoned dreams, unfulfilled hopes, and a great deal of frustration and disappointment with who I've become and how my life has turned out thus far.
Ultimately, I think it's good for me to face these demons. I am bolstered by a homily I heard at mass recently, about how we shouldn't be afraid to suffer. Suffering unites us to Christ on the cross, and purifies us, much like precious metals are purified in a refinery. I would not do the homily justice if I tried to explain it further, but it really resonated with me and encouraged me not to escape or dull any of the pain I'm enduring.
If I were to try to fill my head with music instead of thoughts, then my running would be an escape -- I'd be running away from the pain. Instead, I need to run to it, and through it. This reminds me of the popular children's song/book, "Going on a Bear Hunt" -- with each obstacle they face on their journey, they discover they can't go over it or under it, so they have to go through it.
I must face all of the obstacles in my head the same way -- the recent trauma and the other issues alike. I can't block them out with music. I can't dull them with alcohol (and thankfully I haven't really been too tempted to try). At some point I'll have to stop trying to escape them by emotional eating, but I'm not *quite* ready yet.
I can't go over them. I can't go under them. I have to go through them. And with every prayer I utter, every word I type here, and every silent step that I run, I am.
Tuesday, February 18, 2014
Much-Needed Structure {Weekly Summary}
I love order and structure.
This is not to say that I am rigid -- I enjoy being spontaneous and deviating from routine on occasion. But it's very important to me first to have that routine in place before I can deviate from it.
So to satisfy my craving for structure, I'm resuming my weekly summary posts. I am going to keep track of most of the same things I did before, but I've re-ordered them according to my new priorities. I might also add or delete some as time goes by, if I find this list doesn't capture adequately my progress and goals.
Without further ado, I give you my week of Feb. 10-16:
Total # of Workouts: 3
Total # of Runs: 2
Longest run without walking (time): 7 minutes
Highest total running mileage in one day: approx. 1.25 miles
Total running mileage for the week: approx. 2.4 miles
*Fastest speed sustained over a mile: N/A
Progress on training plans: I'm on day 5 or 6 of the ab challenge I'm doing. I'm in week 2 of the 5K training plan that I'm somewhat following. It's a Jeff Galloway plan, and while I don't follow his specific instructions for run/walk intervals, I do take walking breaks whenever needed. At some point I will set goals that involve more running without walking, but for now I am focusing on total times or mileage, with as much walking as necessary.
**Progress on safety goals: Now that I'm exercising fairly regularly, I am working steadily toward being stronger and faster. Next I need to look into self-defense classes. I think I might want to start by just learning a few basic moves to protect myself, and then research and select a particular discipline to study.
Injury Report: Nothing yet. I do seem to be coming down with a cold today, but hopefully that won't hold me back much.
Weight: 229
Weekly Change: N/A
Overall Change: -1 from new starting weight of 230
BMI: 33.3 (obese)
Jean Size: 20
Waist Circumference: Have not measured lately
Next event goal: None yet.
Last week's goals: N/A
This week's goals: (1) Run 3 times. (2) Do at least 5 ab workouts. (3) Write 2 or more blog posts, including this one.
Analysis: I'm a little disappointed in myself for not running over the weekend, but otherwise I'm satisfied with my progress thus far. I know from experience that once I get used to exercising regularly, it will be easier to make myself do so even on the days when I'm tired or just not in the mood. Finding the time is always a challenge for me, but I think I'm doing a decent job. So basically, I want to keep doing what I'm doing, only MORE!
I want to explain my two new summary stats:
*Fastest speed sustained over a mile: Part of the reason I'm getting back into running is so I can run away from would-be attackers in the future, if necessary. Unfortunately, I'm a very slow runner. Normally I don't mind being pokey, but I can't count on the person chasing me also being slow, so I need to focus at least a little on increasing my speed. I don't care if I can't maintain a higher speed over long distances -- I figure a mile ought to be enough for me to get to safety in most situations. This isn't something I will work on every time I run, but once in a while I will hop on the treadmill and see what's the highest speed I can maintain over a mile. Of course, I need to be able to run a solid mile without stopping first, even at my slow speed, so this spot might remain blank for a while.
**Progress on safety goals: I'm not sure exactly what I will talk about here each week. I just know I want to stay focused on why I'm doing this right now. I want to be stronger and faster and better able to defend myself should I ever again come under attack. I'm starting with core strength and running, but I want to add other strength training, cross training, and self-defense/martial arts. Right now it's sort of all open-ended...I will follow wherever this journey leads me. There might not be too many specific, measurable goals to address here, but I want to give myself a chance to reflect on whether I feel stronger and safer, and why or why not, and what I can do to keep improving.
This is a lot of variables to keep track of, but I love to be able to measure my progress. The numbers will only tell part of the story, though, so I'll try to post more often and reflect on all the other ways this process is affecting my life! I'm working on real change here. Big change. Positive change. And the best is yet to come!
This is not to say that I am rigid -- I enjoy being spontaneous and deviating from routine on occasion. But it's very important to me first to have that routine in place before I can deviate from it.
So to satisfy my craving for structure, I'm resuming my weekly summary posts. I am going to keep track of most of the same things I did before, but I've re-ordered them according to my new priorities. I might also add or delete some as time goes by, if I find this list doesn't capture adequately my progress and goals.
Without further ado, I give you my week of Feb. 10-16:
Total # of Workouts: 3
Total # of Runs: 2
Longest run without walking (time): 7 minutes
Highest total running mileage in one day: approx. 1.25 miles
Total running mileage for the week: approx. 2.4 miles
*Fastest speed sustained over a mile: N/A
Progress on training plans: I'm on day 5 or 6 of the ab challenge I'm doing. I'm in week 2 of the 5K training plan that I'm somewhat following. It's a Jeff Galloway plan, and while I don't follow his specific instructions for run/walk intervals, I do take walking breaks whenever needed. At some point I will set goals that involve more running without walking, but for now I am focusing on total times or mileage, with as much walking as necessary.
**Progress on safety goals: Now that I'm exercising fairly regularly, I am working steadily toward being stronger and faster. Next I need to look into self-defense classes. I think I might want to start by just learning a few basic moves to protect myself, and then research and select a particular discipline to study.
Injury Report: Nothing yet. I do seem to be coming down with a cold today, but hopefully that won't hold me back much.
Weight: 229
Weekly Change: N/A
Overall Change: -1 from new starting weight of 230
BMI: 33.3 (obese)
Jean Size: 20
Waist Circumference: Have not measured lately
Next event goal: None yet.
Last week's goals: N/A
This week's goals: (1) Run 3 times. (2) Do at least 5 ab workouts. (3) Write 2 or more blog posts, including this one.
Analysis: I'm a little disappointed in myself for not running over the weekend, but otherwise I'm satisfied with my progress thus far. I know from experience that once I get used to exercising regularly, it will be easier to make myself do so even on the days when I'm tired or just not in the mood. Finding the time is always a challenge for me, but I think I'm doing a decent job. So basically, I want to keep doing what I'm doing, only MORE!
I want to explain my two new summary stats:
*Fastest speed sustained over a mile: Part of the reason I'm getting back into running is so I can run away from would-be attackers in the future, if necessary. Unfortunately, I'm a very slow runner. Normally I don't mind being pokey, but I can't count on the person chasing me also being slow, so I need to focus at least a little on increasing my speed. I don't care if I can't maintain a higher speed over long distances -- I figure a mile ought to be enough for me to get to safety in most situations. This isn't something I will work on every time I run, but once in a while I will hop on the treadmill and see what's the highest speed I can maintain over a mile. Of course, I need to be able to run a solid mile without stopping first, even at my slow speed, so this spot might remain blank for a while.
**Progress on safety goals: I'm not sure exactly what I will talk about here each week. I just know I want to stay focused on why I'm doing this right now. I want to be stronger and faster and better able to defend myself should I ever again come under attack. I'm starting with core strength and running, but I want to add other strength training, cross training, and self-defense/martial arts. Right now it's sort of all open-ended...I will follow wherever this journey leads me. There might not be too many specific, measurable goals to address here, but I want to give myself a chance to reflect on whether I feel stronger and safer, and why or why not, and what I can do to keep improving.
This is a lot of variables to keep track of, but I love to be able to measure my progress. The numbers will only tell part of the story, though, so I'll try to post more often and reflect on all the other ways this process is affecting my life! I'm working on real change here. Big change. Positive change. And the best is yet to come!
Wednesday, February 5, 2014
First Setback Overcome
Naturally, when I wrote my last post, I had every intention of moving forward, building momentum, and charging toward my new goals of getting strong and fast.
Instead, I spent two weeks battling strep throat.
After a round of antibiotics and lots of rest, I'm feeling well again and my motivation has returned. I resumed running this week and will resume my ab workouts soon as well.
I have to say, I jumped back into exercise in order to improve my physical health and personal safety, but I already can tell that it's having a positive effect on my mental health as well. My emotions and thoughts have been all over the place the past few weeks, and I've had more bad days than good. But working out boosts my mood every single time, even when it's just a few ab exercises. I'm willing to cling to anything healthy that makes me smile and makes me feel like I have any control whatsoever over my life.
My plan is to try to write more often, especially the weekly updates, because it helps me keep track of my progress. I'm still trying to decide what all I'm going to monitor in light of my new goals. Hopefully I'll have all that figured out in time for an update on Monday or Tuesday to cover this week. Meanwhile, be on the lookout for posts on other topics as well. The Olympics start this week, so I'm sure to be inspired!
Thanks for everyone's kind words to me here or on Facebook. I've been buoyed by your support and will continue to rely on it. I am blessed to know so many wonderful people who truly care about my well-being!
Instead, I spent two weeks battling strep throat.
After a round of antibiotics and lots of rest, I'm feeling well again and my motivation has returned. I resumed running this week and will resume my ab workouts soon as well.
I have to say, I jumped back into exercise in order to improve my physical health and personal safety, but I already can tell that it's having a positive effect on my mental health as well. My emotions and thoughts have been all over the place the past few weeks, and I've had more bad days than good. But working out boosts my mood every single time, even when it's just a few ab exercises. I'm willing to cling to anything healthy that makes me smile and makes me feel like I have any control whatsoever over my life.
My plan is to try to write more often, especially the weekly updates, because it helps me keep track of my progress. I'm still trying to decide what all I'm going to monitor in light of my new goals. Hopefully I'll have all that figured out in time for an update on Monday or Tuesday to cover this week. Meanwhile, be on the lookout for posts on other topics as well. The Olympics start this week, so I'm sure to be inspired!
Thanks for everyone's kind words to me here or on Facebook. I've been buoyed by your support and will continue to rely on it. I am blessed to know so many wonderful people who truly care about my well-being!
Wednesday, January 15, 2014
Power Struggle
A few days ago, I was assaulted by a group of teenagers during my evening commute from work. Though the physical damage was minimal, the psychological trauma is going to take a little longer to overcome.
Though the kids were young and not very big, they outnumbered me, and their behavior was very threatening. I didn't know whether they wanted just to rob me, or if they intended to inflict pain. Despite my shouts and my obvious distress, not a single passerby came to my aid. I felt alone...defenseless...helpless...powerless.
I never want to feel that way again.
I don't know why I was chosen as their target, but they seemed to be amused by my size. They mocked my "fat ass" and laughed as they urged me to "run, bitch, run!" I refused to put on the show they probably wanted as they recorded on their cell phones, and kept my brisk walking pace all the way to the train station. I didn't run because I didn't want to give them more of a chance to mock me, but also because I knew I couldn't get away from them if I tried. In my current shape, there is no way I could outrun a bunch of healthy teenagers.
I couldn't fight them off and I couldn't run away. Even though I escaped the situation mostly unharmed, I am acutely aware of what COULD have happened, and what could still happen in the future if I don't make some changes.
For too long I have convinced myself that getting into shape could wait because I'm not suffering any negative health consequences yet. Though my weight is possibly the highest it has ever been outside of pregnancy, it's not keeping me from doing any of the things I normally do. I thought I could take my time and start eating right and exercising gradually when my schedule permitted. This approach might have worked, if Monday hadn't happened.
But Monday did happen. The assault did happen. Those misguided kids thought it would be fun to terrorize an innocent woman, and they picked me. Maybe it was fun for them, but for me it was a nightmare. They took away my sense of security in ordinary activities like going to work. They took away that bubble of blissful ignorance (and innocence, perhaps?) we all live in when we haven't been a victim of a violent crime. That bubble, once popped, is gone for good. I don't believe they fully took away my dignity, because though they tried their best to humiliate me, I didn't give them all they wanted.
But they did take away my power. I know now exactly how weak I am, and the strength of my will cannot overcome the weakness of my body.
Here's where you and my blog come in -- I want to get my power back! I want to be strong and I want to be fast and I want to be capable of defending myself against most attackers. I want to know that I'm physically tough enough that I don't need to be afraid to walk down the street. I have my work cut out for me, but I have already begun.
As soon as I can, I plan to take some self-defense classes. In the meantime, I've started doing some ab/core exercises, which will soon be followed by workouts for my upper body/arms. And this evening, about 48 hours after the attack, I laced up my good ol' Asics and went out for a run.
Wow. I am out of shape. Like, really really really out of shape! But I'm on my way back, and I've never been more motivated. I don't care what I look like, or what size I wear. I don't even care what races I may or may not run, though I'm sure I will revisit those goals eventually. For now, I just want to be strong and fast and POWERFUL.
And I will be.
Thanks for your support!
Though the kids were young and not very big, they outnumbered me, and their behavior was very threatening. I didn't know whether they wanted just to rob me, or if they intended to inflict pain. Despite my shouts and my obvious distress, not a single passerby came to my aid. I felt alone...defenseless...helpless...powerless.
I never want to feel that way again.
I don't know why I was chosen as their target, but they seemed to be amused by my size. They mocked my "fat ass" and laughed as they urged me to "run, bitch, run!" I refused to put on the show they probably wanted as they recorded on their cell phones, and kept my brisk walking pace all the way to the train station. I didn't run because I didn't want to give them more of a chance to mock me, but also because I knew I couldn't get away from them if I tried. In my current shape, there is no way I could outrun a bunch of healthy teenagers.
I couldn't fight them off and I couldn't run away. Even though I escaped the situation mostly unharmed, I am acutely aware of what COULD have happened, and what could still happen in the future if I don't make some changes.
For too long I have convinced myself that getting into shape could wait because I'm not suffering any negative health consequences yet. Though my weight is possibly the highest it has ever been outside of pregnancy, it's not keeping me from doing any of the things I normally do. I thought I could take my time and start eating right and exercising gradually when my schedule permitted. This approach might have worked, if Monday hadn't happened.
But Monday did happen. The assault did happen. Those misguided kids thought it would be fun to terrorize an innocent woman, and they picked me. Maybe it was fun for them, but for me it was a nightmare. They took away my sense of security in ordinary activities like going to work. They took away that bubble of blissful ignorance (and innocence, perhaps?) we all live in when we haven't been a victim of a violent crime. That bubble, once popped, is gone for good. I don't believe they fully took away my dignity, because though they tried their best to humiliate me, I didn't give them all they wanted.
But they did take away my power. I know now exactly how weak I am, and the strength of my will cannot overcome the weakness of my body.
Here's where you and my blog come in -- I want to get my power back! I want to be strong and I want to be fast and I want to be capable of defending myself against most attackers. I want to know that I'm physically tough enough that I don't need to be afraid to walk down the street. I have my work cut out for me, but I have already begun.
As soon as I can, I plan to take some self-defense classes. In the meantime, I've started doing some ab/core exercises, which will soon be followed by workouts for my upper body/arms. And this evening, about 48 hours after the attack, I laced up my good ol' Asics and went out for a run.
Wow. I am out of shape. Like, really really really out of shape! But I'm on my way back, and I've never been more motivated. I don't care what I look like, or what size I wear. I don't even care what races I may or may not run, though I'm sure I will revisit those goals eventually. For now, I just want to be strong and fast and POWERFUL.
And I will be.
Thanks for your support!
Tuesday, October 29, 2013
I Will Persevere {Weekly Summary}
Weight: 222
Weekly Change: -1 (since last posted update, but have been at this weight for a few weeks now)
Overall Change: -3
Next goal weight: 220
BMI: 32.3 (obese) (using this calculator)
Waist Circumference: 40 inches
Disease Risk: Very High (according to this chart)
Jeans Size: 20
Total Workouts: 5
Total Walks: 4
Total Other Workouts: 1
Progress on Training Plan(s): Not working on any sort of training plan yet, but considering starting one for core strengthening.
Injury Report: My same stupid left big toe is causing problems again. At the base of the side where the ingrown nail was cut out, last week a bump developed, followed by redness and swelling and PAIN. Somehow the area has become infected! I just can't win with this toe. I'm treating the infection as best I can and hoping that solves the problem, because I don't really have extra time or money to waste on another visit to the podiatrist right now. So far this issue hasn't slowed me down any -- I have limped around just fine. I guess in this one sense it's fortunate that I'm not back into running yet, or else I'd be even more frustrated than I am!
Next Event Goal: Same report as last week: "None on the horizon at the moment. I'm focusing on establishing exercise as a routine, and healthier eating habits, and making fitness a priority even within my insanely busy schedule. Additionally, money is really tight right now and race fees are a luxury I can do without." Still nothing has changed since I first drafted that quote, but missing out on fall races is making me sad. I really hope to be racing this time next year!
Last Week's Goal(s): I've accomplished 2 of the 3, though one was due to changing my perspective rather than actually doing something new. I realized that coaching my kids' soccer team on Saturday mornings is actually a bit of a workout for me, so I've decided to count it as such. Of course, we have only one game left in the season, so I will soon be back to trying to motivate myself to do something active other than walk!! I did finally measure my waist, and have decided to keep doing that on a monthly basis (will aim for the 1st Friday of the month). This blog, sadly, continues to be neglected. :-(
This Week's Goals: (1) Work on more blog posts (even if they're not completed). (2) Choose a core-strengthening plan and get started. (3) Exercise self-control and embrace moderation with Halloween candy and treats this week.
Analysis: I'm going to be completely honest here -- I have not been doing well. My head is a bit of a mess. I've been full of self-doubt lately, feeling like a failure in many aspects of my life. This weekend I started to consider ending this blog and scrapping my fitness goals completely because they feel completely beyond my reach at the moment. In trying to turn my attitude back from negative to positive, I am drawing inspiration from a favorite Helen Keller quote:
"Be of good cheer. Do not think of today's failures, but of the success that may come tomorrow. You have set yourselves a difficult task, but you will succeed if you persevere; and you will find a joy in overcoming obstacles. Remember, no effort that we make to attain something beautiful is ever lost."
And so I will persevere. That's all I've really got right now -- the decision to persevere. I know I need to back it up with action but for now all I've got is the decision itself. I will persevere.
Weekly Change: -1 (since last posted update, but have been at this weight for a few weeks now)
Overall Change: -3
Next goal weight: 220
BMI: 32.3 (obese) (using this calculator)
Waist Circumference: 40 inches
Disease Risk: Very High (according to this chart)
Jeans Size: 20
Total Workouts: 5
Total Walks: 4
Total Other Workouts: 1
Progress on Training Plan(s): Not working on any sort of training plan yet, but considering starting one for core strengthening.
Injury Report: My same stupid left big toe is causing problems again. At the base of the side where the ingrown nail was cut out, last week a bump developed, followed by redness and swelling and PAIN. Somehow the area has become infected! I just can't win with this toe. I'm treating the infection as best I can and hoping that solves the problem, because I don't really have extra time or money to waste on another visit to the podiatrist right now. So far this issue hasn't slowed me down any -- I have limped around just fine. I guess in this one sense it's fortunate that I'm not back into running yet, or else I'd be even more frustrated than I am!
Next Event Goal: Same report as last week: "None on the horizon at the moment. I'm focusing on establishing exercise as a routine, and healthier eating habits, and making fitness a priority even within my insanely busy schedule. Additionally, money is really tight right now and race fees are a luxury I can do without." Still nothing has changed since I first drafted that quote, but missing out on fall races is making me sad. I really hope to be racing this time next year!
Last Week's Goal(s): I've accomplished 2 of the 3, though one was due to changing my perspective rather than actually doing something new. I realized that coaching my kids' soccer team on Saturday mornings is actually a bit of a workout for me, so I've decided to count it as such. Of course, we have only one game left in the season, so I will soon be back to trying to motivate myself to do something active other than walk!! I did finally measure my waist, and have decided to keep doing that on a monthly basis (will aim for the 1st Friday of the month). This blog, sadly, continues to be neglected. :-(
This Week's Goals: (1) Work on more blog posts (even if they're not completed). (2) Choose a core-strengthening plan and get started. (3) Exercise self-control and embrace moderation with Halloween candy and treats this week.
Analysis: I'm going to be completely honest here -- I have not been doing well. My head is a bit of a mess. I've been full of self-doubt lately, feeling like a failure in many aspects of my life. This weekend I started to consider ending this blog and scrapping my fitness goals completely because they feel completely beyond my reach at the moment. In trying to turn my attitude back from negative to positive, I am drawing inspiration from a favorite Helen Keller quote:
"Be of good cheer. Do not think of today's failures, but of the success that may come tomorrow. You have set yourselves a difficult task, but you will succeed if you persevere; and you will find a joy in overcoming obstacles. Remember, no effort that we make to attain something beautiful is ever lost."
And so I will persevere. That's all I've really got right now -- the decision to persevere. I know I need to back it up with action but for now all I've got is the decision itself. I will persevere.
Tuesday, October 1, 2013
Timing is Everything {Weekly Summary}
Weight: 223
Weekly Change: N/A
Overall Change: -2
Next goal weight: 220
BMI: 32.5 (obese) (using this calculator)
Waist Circumference: 40 inches, I think...still haven't measured
Disease Risk: Very High (according to this chart)
Jeans Size: 20
Total Workouts: 2
Total Walks: 2
Total Other Workouts: 0
Progress on Training Plan(s): Not working on any sort of training plan yet, but considering starting one for core strengthening.
Injury Report: No injuries or illnesses at the moment.
Next Event Goal: Same report as last week: "None on the horizon at the moment. I'm focusing on establishing exercise as a routine, and healthier eating habits, and making fitness a priority even within my insanely busy schedule. Additionally, money is really tight right now and race fees are a luxury I can do without."
Last Week's Goal(s): Once again failed at all three.
This Week's Goals: Repeating last week's goals AGAIN: (1) Do one exercise other than walking. (2) Work on more blog posts (even if they're not completed). (3) Measure my waist.
Analysis: Last week I was really off my game in a lot of ways. I was trying to start driving myself to the train instead of having my husband drop me off, but I didn't get the timing right a single time! I missed the train every day and ended up driving instead. Without that built-in exercise of the walk to my office building, I ended up having a fairly sedentary week. Thankfully I had an active weekend to help make up for it! I'm still working a lot of OT so squeezing in anything extra during the week has been an insurmountable challenge thus far. Healthy eating has been going reasonably well, but I didn't maintain it over the weekend. It can't be helped. There was cake. :) I just hope I can be active enough this week not to suffer a setback on the scale!
Weekly Change: N/A
Overall Change: -2
Next goal weight: 220
BMI: 32.5 (obese) (using this calculator)
Waist Circumference: 40 inches, I think...still haven't measured
Disease Risk: Very High (according to this chart)
Jeans Size: 20
Total Workouts: 2
Total Walks: 2
Total Other Workouts: 0
Progress on Training Plan(s): Not working on any sort of training plan yet, but considering starting one for core strengthening.
Injury Report: No injuries or illnesses at the moment.
Next Event Goal: Same report as last week: "None on the horizon at the moment. I'm focusing on establishing exercise as a routine, and healthier eating habits, and making fitness a priority even within my insanely busy schedule. Additionally, money is really tight right now and race fees are a luxury I can do without."
Last Week's Goal(s): Once again failed at all three.
This Week's Goals: Repeating last week's goals AGAIN: (1) Do one exercise other than walking. (2) Work on more blog posts (even if they're not completed). (3) Measure my waist.
Analysis: Last week I was really off my game in a lot of ways. I was trying to start driving myself to the train instead of having my husband drop me off, but I didn't get the timing right a single time! I missed the train every day and ended up driving instead. Without that built-in exercise of the walk to my office building, I ended up having a fairly sedentary week. Thankfully I had an active weekend to help make up for it! I'm still working a lot of OT so squeezing in anything extra during the week has been an insurmountable challenge thus far. Healthy eating has been going reasonably well, but I didn't maintain it over the weekend. It can't be helped. There was cake. :) I just hope I can be active enough this week not to suffer a setback on the scale!
Thursday, September 26, 2013
Still Getting Started {Weekly Summary}
Weight: 223
Weekly Change: -1
Overall Change: -2
Next goal weight: 220
BMI: 32.5 (obese) (using this calculator)
Waist Circumference: 40 inches, I think...still haven't measured
Disease Risk: Very High (according to this chart)
Jeans Size: 20
Total Workouts: 4
Total Walks: 4
Total Other Workouts: 0
Progress on Training Plan(s): Not working on any sort of training plan yet, but considering starting one for core strengthening.
Injury Report: All is well at the moment. Recovering from a minor cold, but it's nothing that would stop me from exercising.
Next Event Goal: Same report as last week: "None on the horizon at the moment. I'm focusing on establishing exercise as a routine, and healthier eating habits, and making fitness a priority even within my insanely busy schedule. Additionally, money is really tight right now and race fees are a luxury I can do without."
Last Week's Goal(s): Failed at all three. To be honest, I did not even remember what they were! This is all the more reason for me to keep up with this blog -- so I will have frequent access to my weekly goals!
This Week's Goals: Repeating last week's goals: (1) Do one exercise other than walking. (2) Work on more blog posts (even if they're not completed). (3) Measure my waist.
Analysis: Based on the way the last week has gone, I'm very grateful for my new commute. I've been working OT and fighting off a cold, but most days I still had to walk to and from the train. It's nice having that built-in exercise right now. It won't be enough to get me to my long-term goals, but it's a great way to get started. I'm exhausted and don't have much more to say about this week. Maybe next week will be more interesting!
Weekly Change: -1
Overall Change: -2
Next goal weight: 220
BMI: 32.5 (obese) (using this calculator)
Waist Circumference: 40 inches, I think...still haven't measured
Disease Risk: Very High (according to this chart)
Jeans Size: 20
Total Workouts: 4
Total Walks: 4
Total Other Workouts: 0
Progress on Training Plan(s): Not working on any sort of training plan yet, but considering starting one for core strengthening.
Injury Report: All is well at the moment. Recovering from a minor cold, but it's nothing that would stop me from exercising.
Next Event Goal: Same report as last week: "None on the horizon at the moment. I'm focusing on establishing exercise as a routine, and healthier eating habits, and making fitness a priority even within my insanely busy schedule. Additionally, money is really tight right now and race fees are a luxury I can do without."
Last Week's Goal(s): Failed at all three. To be honest, I did not even remember what they were! This is all the more reason for me to keep up with this blog -- so I will have frequent access to my weekly goals!
This Week's Goals: Repeating last week's goals: (1) Do one exercise other than walking. (2) Work on more blog posts (even if they're not completed). (3) Measure my waist.
Analysis: Based on the way the last week has gone, I'm very grateful for my new commute. I've been working OT and fighting off a cold, but most days I still had to walk to and from the train. It's nice having that built-in exercise right now. It won't be enough to get me to my long-term goals, but it's a great way to get started. I'm exhausted and don't have much more to say about this week. Maybe next week will be more interesting!
Wednesday, September 18, 2013
Nothing to See Here {Weekly Summary}
Weight: 224
Weekly Change: None
Overall Change: -1 from my new "starting weight" of 225 a few weeks ago
Next goal weight: 220
BMI: 32.6 (obese) (using this calculator)
Waist Circumference: 40 inches, I think...haven't measured in a while
Disease Risk: Very High (according to this chart)
Jeans Size: 20
Total Workouts: 5
Total Walks: 5
Total Other Workouts: 0
Progress on Training Plan(s): Not working on any sort of training plan at the moment.
Injury Report: The toe healed nicely after the ingrown nail was cut out. There is still pain, but that is from a toenail fungus (ew!) that I can't yet afford to treat. I want to do the laser treatment rather than the topical products that don't really work or the drugs that have scary side effects. Unfortunately, the laser treatment is considered cosmetic and not covered by insurance, so it might be a while until I can save up for it. Meanwhile I'll just tough it out whenever the toe hurts.
Next Event Goal: None on the horizon at the moment. I'm focusing on establishing exercise as a routine, and healthier eating habits, and making fitness a priority even within my insanely busy schedule. Additionally, money is really tight right now and race fees are a luxury I can do without.
Last Week's Goal(s): Didn't really set any.
This Week's Goals: (1) Do one exercise other than walking. (2) Work on more blog posts (even if they're not completed). (3) Measure my waist.
Analysis: A lot has changed since the last time I did one of these weekly update posts. Once my toe healed, I was in a long period of transition in which I went back to work and my kids returned to school and fall activities. Now our busy schedule is in full swing, but fortunately I am able to exercise! We faced some major car trouble (both cars broken down at once -- that was a bit of a nightmare, but we lived through it!) that forced me to try out a train commute to work. It was a blessing in disguise, because I absolutely love taking the train! It's so much less stressful than driving, and even though it takes longer, part of that time is built-in exercise when I walk about a mile from the station to my office building. Eventually I do want to add in more/other exercise, but this is a great start and I'm thoroughly enjoying it. As my last post indicated, I'm also starting to put the brakes on my runaway train of bad eating habits. I'm doing reasonably well with that so far, in my humble opinion. Hopefully soon I'll start to see some gradual results on the scale and in how my clothes fit. I'm setting my goals pretty small and vague for this coming week. It's been a long time since I've had much success with the goals I've set here, so I want to build my confidence up before pushing myself too hard. We'll see if it works!
Weekly Change: None
Overall Change: -1 from my new "starting weight" of 225 a few weeks ago
Next goal weight: 220
BMI: 32.6 (obese) (using this calculator)
Waist Circumference: 40 inches, I think...haven't measured in a while
Disease Risk: Very High (according to this chart)
Jeans Size: 20
Total Workouts: 5
Total Walks: 5
Total Other Workouts: 0
Progress on Training Plan(s): Not working on any sort of training plan at the moment.
Injury Report: The toe healed nicely after the ingrown nail was cut out. There is still pain, but that is from a toenail fungus (ew!) that I can't yet afford to treat. I want to do the laser treatment rather than the topical products that don't really work or the drugs that have scary side effects. Unfortunately, the laser treatment is considered cosmetic and not covered by insurance, so it might be a while until I can save up for it. Meanwhile I'll just tough it out whenever the toe hurts.
Next Event Goal: None on the horizon at the moment. I'm focusing on establishing exercise as a routine, and healthier eating habits, and making fitness a priority even within my insanely busy schedule. Additionally, money is really tight right now and race fees are a luxury I can do without.
Last Week's Goal(s): Didn't really set any.
This Week's Goals: (1) Do one exercise other than walking. (2) Work on more blog posts (even if they're not completed). (3) Measure my waist.
Analysis: A lot has changed since the last time I did one of these weekly update posts. Once my toe healed, I was in a long period of transition in which I went back to work and my kids returned to school and fall activities. Now our busy schedule is in full swing, but fortunately I am able to exercise! We faced some major car trouble (both cars broken down at once -- that was a bit of a nightmare, but we lived through it!) that forced me to try out a train commute to work. It was a blessing in disguise, because I absolutely love taking the train! It's so much less stressful than driving, and even though it takes longer, part of that time is built-in exercise when I walk about a mile from the station to my office building. Eventually I do want to add in more/other exercise, but this is a great start and I'm thoroughly enjoying it. As my last post indicated, I'm also starting to put the brakes on my runaway train of bad eating habits. I'm doing reasonably well with that so far, in my humble opinion. Hopefully soon I'll start to see some gradual results on the scale and in how my clothes fit. I'm setting my goals pretty small and vague for this coming week. It's been a long time since I've had much success with the goals I've set here, so I want to build my confidence up before pushing myself too hard. We'll see if it works!
Thursday, September 5, 2013
Talking to Myself About Food
WE INTERRUPT THIS BAG OF FRITOS TO BRING YOU MY CURRENT THOUGHTS ON NUTRITION
I haven't been blogging much lately. I haven't had much progress to report, and I haven't had the time to flesh out any of my thoughts into posts "worthy" of a blog following.
Is it just me, or does it seem like more and more blogs have been going viral lately? Everyone is talking to someone -- a letter to my daughter, a conversation with my son, a note to other people's daughters, an address to the lady who wrote to other people's daughters, and so on and so on. Meanwhile, here I am in my own little corner, munching on my Fritos and talking to myself. Is anything I say worth posting in the world of viral blogs?
Get over yourself, me. You're being silly. Very little of what you write here would be interesting to anyone beyond the handful of friends and family who have followed you thus far, and that was the point of this blog in the first place. You are tracking your progress and making meaningful connections, and therefore your posts are worth sharing here even if they are short and uninspired and not designed to be reposted by strangers. So keep writing and stop worrying if your blog is "worthy."
WHEW. Okay, I got that out of my system. Now back to my struggle--er, ah...journey. I'm back to work full-time now and stuck in the same conundrum I experienced after my last baby -- just not enough hours in the day to work, nurse my baby, spend time with the rest of the family, AND exercise. The difference this time around is that I'm not beating myself up over it. I knew it would be this way for a while, so I'm just going to be patient and do what I can.
Meanwhile, I do still need to do something to start losing weight, because my plus-size wardrobe is in sad shape and I'm too broke to do anything about it. So, it's time to focus on nutrition!
I've said before that I don't diet -- I just don't like the psychology of it, and I haven't seen people make positive lifestyle changes while caught in that psychology. I just go through periods of my life when I'm making mostly healthy eating choices, and periods when I'm not even trying to make healthy choices at all. Pregnancy always ends up in the latter category, and then afterwards it's a struggle to change my mindset back again. Most of it is an issue of habit. When I'm in the habit of eating junk, then it's easy to stay in that habit. Once I get back in the habit of making good choices, it will be easy to continue doing so.
Here are the "rules" of my plan*:
1. No food is completely off-limits. That goes along with the psychology of dieting, and I don't think it's healthy. It just sets you up to play mind games with yourself and ultimately you will lose. Being healthy means being aware of what you're eating and what it does to your body, and having the good sense and self-control to eat less of the things that are bad for you and more of the things that are good for you. If you ban various foods, you will not be able to develop that sense fully. Also, I simply refuse to give up cake, and if THAT'S not off-limits, why on earth should anything else be? :)
2. Eat when hungry. Your body lets you know when it needs fuel. You don't refuse to gas up your car when the needle is on E. A body is not designed to run well on fumes.
3. Stop when full. This is a tricky one for me. I hate to leave food on my plate or my kids' plates, because then it's being wasted, and I hate waste. However, if your body already has all the calories it needs to function at the moment, the food is being wasted even if you eat it. If it can't be tossed in the fridge and saved for later, then it's wasted whether it's going into your mouth or into the trash. At least the trash bag can be taken out when it gets too big. My pants can't.
4. Don't eat when not hungry. This is the natural companion to #2 and #3, and has a lot to do with habit. Don't eat something just because it's there. Don't snack at a certain time just because you usually snack then. If you're not hungry (and don't have some other compelling reason to eat now rather than later), don't eat.
5. Start eating more whole, natural foods. I love me some processed crap, believe me. And please see rule #1. But in order for the crap not to affect my health negatively, there needs to be less of it. I'm not going to follow any particular fad diet, but I would like to start making small changes here and there to the foods we feed our family. I'm sure our current diet is not the worst one around, but there is definitely room for improvement. Now's as good a time as any.
*I use the word "rules" pretty loosely. They're really more like guidelines to keep in mind. "Rules" that can be broken, resulting in "cheating" and guilt over that cheating are all part of that dieting psychology that I find so unhealthy. If I have seconds on a particularly tasty dinner one night when I know good and well that I don't need to eat any more, I won't be doing anything wrong, just making an unhealthy choice. There will be no guilt and no punishment, just awareness and increased effort not to make that sort of choice the prevailing habit!
So that's it. It's pretty simple, but if I follow it earnestly, I believe it will serve me well. It's really just a matter of shifting from mostly bad choices to mostly good choices, most of the time. This has worked for me before so I'm confident that it will work again. However, if it really doesn't work, then I will re-think the whole thing, because that's how you learn and grow in life.
Very soon I hope to resume my weekly updates, and add in additional posts when I have time. You don't have to share them with everyone you know. My blog doesn't have to be the.most.exciting.thing.EVER in order to be "worthy" of existing. :)
And now back to my reasonably-sized bag of Fritos that is helping to satisfy my current hunger...crunch crunch crunch...
I haven't been blogging much lately. I haven't had much progress to report, and I haven't had the time to flesh out any of my thoughts into posts "worthy" of a blog following.
Is it just me, or does it seem like more and more blogs have been going viral lately? Everyone is talking to someone -- a letter to my daughter, a conversation with my son, a note to other people's daughters, an address to the lady who wrote to other people's daughters, and so on and so on. Meanwhile, here I am in my own little corner, munching on my Fritos and talking to myself. Is anything I say worth posting in the world of viral blogs?
Get over yourself, me. You're being silly. Very little of what you write here would be interesting to anyone beyond the handful of friends and family who have followed you thus far, and that was the point of this blog in the first place. You are tracking your progress and making meaningful connections, and therefore your posts are worth sharing here even if they are short and uninspired and not designed to be reposted by strangers. So keep writing and stop worrying if your blog is "worthy."
WHEW. Okay, I got that out of my system. Now back to my struggle--er, ah...journey. I'm back to work full-time now and stuck in the same conundrum I experienced after my last baby -- just not enough hours in the day to work, nurse my baby, spend time with the rest of the family, AND exercise. The difference this time around is that I'm not beating myself up over it. I knew it would be this way for a while, so I'm just going to be patient and do what I can.
Meanwhile, I do still need to do something to start losing weight, because my plus-size wardrobe is in sad shape and I'm too broke to do anything about it. So, it's time to focus on nutrition!
I've said before that I don't diet -- I just don't like the psychology of it, and I haven't seen people make positive lifestyle changes while caught in that psychology. I just go through periods of my life when I'm making mostly healthy eating choices, and periods when I'm not even trying to make healthy choices at all. Pregnancy always ends up in the latter category, and then afterwards it's a struggle to change my mindset back again. Most of it is an issue of habit. When I'm in the habit of eating junk, then it's easy to stay in that habit. Once I get back in the habit of making good choices, it will be easy to continue doing so.
Here are the "rules" of my plan*:
1. No food is completely off-limits. That goes along with the psychology of dieting, and I don't think it's healthy. It just sets you up to play mind games with yourself and ultimately you will lose. Being healthy means being aware of what you're eating and what it does to your body, and having the good sense and self-control to eat less of the things that are bad for you and more of the things that are good for you. If you ban various foods, you will not be able to develop that sense fully. Also, I simply refuse to give up cake, and if THAT'S not off-limits, why on earth should anything else be? :)
2. Eat when hungry. Your body lets you know when it needs fuel. You don't refuse to gas up your car when the needle is on E. A body is not designed to run well on fumes.
3. Stop when full. This is a tricky one for me. I hate to leave food on my plate or my kids' plates, because then it's being wasted, and I hate waste. However, if your body already has all the calories it needs to function at the moment, the food is being wasted even if you eat it. If it can't be tossed in the fridge and saved for later, then it's wasted whether it's going into your mouth or into the trash. At least the trash bag can be taken out when it gets too big. My pants can't.
4. Don't eat when not hungry. This is the natural companion to #2 and #3, and has a lot to do with habit. Don't eat something just because it's there. Don't snack at a certain time just because you usually snack then. If you're not hungry (and don't have some other compelling reason to eat now rather than later), don't eat.
5. Start eating more whole, natural foods. I love me some processed crap, believe me. And please see rule #1. But in order for the crap not to affect my health negatively, there needs to be less of it. I'm not going to follow any particular fad diet, but I would like to start making small changes here and there to the foods we feed our family. I'm sure our current diet is not the worst one around, but there is definitely room for improvement. Now's as good a time as any.
*I use the word "rules" pretty loosely. They're really more like guidelines to keep in mind. "Rules" that can be broken, resulting in "cheating" and guilt over that cheating are all part of that dieting psychology that I find so unhealthy. If I have seconds on a particularly tasty dinner one night when I know good and well that I don't need to eat any more, I won't be doing anything wrong, just making an unhealthy choice. There will be no guilt and no punishment, just awareness and increased effort not to make that sort of choice the prevailing habit!
So that's it. It's pretty simple, but if I follow it earnestly, I believe it will serve me well. It's really just a matter of shifting from mostly bad choices to mostly good choices, most of the time. This has worked for me before so I'm confident that it will work again. However, if it really doesn't work, then I will re-think the whole thing, because that's how you learn and grow in life.
Very soon I hope to resume my weekly updates, and add in additional posts when I have time. You don't have to share them with everyone you know. My blog doesn't have to be the.most.exciting.thing.EVER in order to be "worthy" of existing. :)
And now back to my reasonably-sized bag of Fritos that is helping to satisfy my current hunger...crunch crunch crunch...
Wednesday, July 17, 2013
Say It Ain't Toe {Weekly Summary}
Weight: 224 (I think...I keep forgetting to weigh myself, and then end up doing it at different times of day so it's not a consistent comparison)
Weekly Change: +2
Overall Change: +4 over "starting weight" of 220
Next goal weight: 214 (pre-pregnancy weight)
BMI: 32.6 (obese) (using this calculator)
Waist Circumference: 40 inches, I think...haven't measured in a while
Disease Risk: Very High (according to this chart)
Jeans Size: 20
Total Workouts: 2
Total Walks: 2
Total Other Workouts: 0
Progress on Training Plan(s): In limbo right now until I see the podiatrist
Injury Report: The broken toe is basically healed now, but as predicted, my big toe has now become the problem. I made a strategic error in trying to deal with the occasional pain under the nail -- I trimmed the nail down too far, and as it started to grow out again it became ingrown. The right side of the nail is basically growing straight down into the toe. It's been getting increasingly painful, and as of yesterday it appeared to be infected. I made an appointment to see a podiatrist tomorrow and I think there's a pretty good chance part of the nail will have to be cut off/out of my toe. From what I've read online, the healing time from this sort of procedure can be anywhere from 2 weeks to 2 months. Obviously, I'm hoping for the shorter time, but I'll know more tomorrow what the doctor thinks I can expect.
Last Week's Goal(s): Failed at two: did not work on a nutrition plan, and did no non-walking exercise. But I did succeed at one though, by going walking twice! Yay!
Next Event Goal: Still planning, very tentatively, on the Arlington 9/11 Memorial 5K, but it depends on what happens with my toe. I wouldn't mind walking most of it, but I don't really have any desire to limp through the whole thing.
This Week's Goals: (1) See the podiatrist. (2) Work on a nutrition plan. (3) Figure out an exercise plan based on doctor's recommendations.
Analysis: I don't have too much to say right now. I'm angry at myself for making my toe situation so much worse. Last week I was enjoying going for walks again, and now here I am back in injury recovery mode once more. I don't really know the severity of the problem or how long I can expect it to interfere with my fitness plans, so I'll save that speculation for after my doctor appointment tomorrow. For now, I really need to focus on nutrition and start thinking hard about how I'm going to approach food. I know some of the changes I need to make, but haven't managed to make myself take any action so far. It might help to write out some specific plans, so I really hope to accomplish that one of my goals this week. Expect another post soon!
Weekly Change: +2
Overall Change: +4 over "starting weight" of 220
Next goal weight: 214 (pre-pregnancy weight)
BMI: 32.6 (obese) (using this calculator)
Waist Circumference: 40 inches, I think...haven't measured in a while
Disease Risk: Very High (according to this chart)
Jeans Size: 20
Total Workouts: 2
Total Walks: 2
Total Other Workouts: 0
Progress on Training Plan(s): In limbo right now until I see the podiatrist
Injury Report: The broken toe is basically healed now, but as predicted, my big toe has now become the problem. I made a strategic error in trying to deal with the occasional pain under the nail -- I trimmed the nail down too far, and as it started to grow out again it became ingrown. The right side of the nail is basically growing straight down into the toe. It's been getting increasingly painful, and as of yesterday it appeared to be infected. I made an appointment to see a podiatrist tomorrow and I think there's a pretty good chance part of the nail will have to be cut off/out of my toe. From what I've read online, the healing time from this sort of procedure can be anywhere from 2 weeks to 2 months. Obviously, I'm hoping for the shorter time, but I'll know more tomorrow what the doctor thinks I can expect.
Last Week's Goal(s): Failed at two: did not work on a nutrition plan, and did no non-walking exercise. But I did succeed at one though, by going walking twice! Yay!
Next Event Goal: Still planning, very tentatively, on the Arlington 9/11 Memorial 5K, but it depends on what happens with my toe. I wouldn't mind walking most of it, but I don't really have any desire to limp through the whole thing.
This Week's Goals: (1) See the podiatrist. (2) Work on a nutrition plan. (3) Figure out an exercise plan based on doctor's recommendations.
Analysis: I don't have too much to say right now. I'm angry at myself for making my toe situation so much worse. Last week I was enjoying going for walks again, and now here I am back in injury recovery mode once more. I don't really know the severity of the problem or how long I can expect it to interfere with my fitness plans, so I'll save that speculation for after my doctor appointment tomorrow. For now, I really need to focus on nutrition and start thinking hard about how I'm going to approach food. I know some of the changes I need to make, but haven't managed to make myself take any action so far. It might help to write out some specific plans, so I really hope to accomplish that one of my goals this week. Expect another post soon!
Tuesday, July 9, 2013
Mirror, Mirror {Weekly Summary}
Weight: 222
Weekly Change: +2
Overall Change: +2 over "starting weight" of 220
Next goal weight: 214 (pre-pregnancy weight)
BMI: 32.3 (obese) (using this calculator)
Waist Circumference: 40 inches, I think
Disease Risk: Very High (according to this chart)
Jeans Size: 20
Total Workouts: 1
Total Walks: 0
Total Other Workouts: 1
Progress on Training Plan(s): Easing back into walking now that toe is healing less, but still not on any specific plan
Injury Report: The broken toe is mostly healed now. It really is taking 6 weeks, so if you ever break a toe and wonder if it will take as long to heal as "they" say it will, the answer is YES. I'm just excited that I finally don't need to keep it taped all the time, and I managed to wear shoes with heels this weekend without too much pain. Meanwhile, I'm having more issues with the big toe on the same foot -- you know, the toe that I mysteriously busted a year and a half ago. At some point I may need to see a doctor about it because something just isn't right. I hope it won't cause too many problems when I eventually start running again.
Last Week's Goal(s): I think I finally accomplished #2, which was to do some exercise that doesn't involve the toe. I did some exercises in our little swimming pool one day last week. It was a short, simple workout, but it was something.
Next Event Goal: Still planning on the Arlington 9/11 Memorial 5K, though it's looking more and more likely that I'll be walking most of it.
This Week's Goals: (1) Work on a nutrition plan. (2) Walk at least 2x. (3) Do some non-walking exercise.
Analysis: The only thing that has changed really since my last post is my outlook. I think I'm finally starting to get my motivation back, especially now that my toe is doing a lot better. It has happened in a sort of roundabout way though, starting with a moment a couple of weeks ago where I looked at myself in the mirror and decided truly to embrace my curves and see beauty in my body even when it is so far from physically fit. Even though I haven't been driven by a desire to be thin, per se, I also haven't been comfortable in my own skin for a long time. I felt like being obese automatically made me unattractive, even though I didn't see other big women the same way. I just felt like fat didn't look good on me. And now suddenly I'm done seeing myself that way. I don't know what made the difference.
Maybe I tried seeing myself the way my husband sees me -- all through my pregnancies and weight fluctuations over the years, he has never stopped finding me beautiful and telling me so. It just seems silly to waste energy looking for every flaw when I look in the mirror and feeling self-conscious in all of my clothes. I also read an article about how damaging it can be for a daughter to hear a mother call herself fat -- it can end up creating a warped idea of beauty in the daughter's mind. I don't want to do that to my daughter, so I want to start NOW to develop a better body image in my own mind. That way I can pass positive ideas on to my little girl as soon as she's old enough to start picking up on them.
Now that I'm even less motivated by my appearance than ever, it seems like it should be harder to find the drive to lose weight and get in shape, but I think instead I'm just getting even more focused on health. I truly do yearn to be healthy. I want to be able to run and swim and bike (of course), and also hike and roller skate and play around with my kids. I don't want to be at increased risk of various diseases. I want to sleep better, and feel less stressed, and have strong bones that won't start deteriorating in about 10 years. So for all of those reasons, I am ready to really TRY again, to start eating better and getting regular exercise. I started off this new week pretty well, so I'm optimistic!
Weekly Change: +2
Overall Change: +2 over "starting weight" of 220
Next goal weight: 214 (pre-pregnancy weight)
BMI: 32.3 (obese) (using this calculator)
Waist Circumference: 40 inches, I think
Disease Risk: Very High (according to this chart)
Jeans Size: 20
Total Workouts: 1
Total Walks: 0
Total Other Workouts: 1
Progress on Training Plan(s): Easing back into walking now that toe is healing less, but still not on any specific plan
Injury Report: The broken toe is mostly healed now. It really is taking 6 weeks, so if you ever break a toe and wonder if it will take as long to heal as "they" say it will, the answer is YES. I'm just excited that I finally don't need to keep it taped all the time, and I managed to wear shoes with heels this weekend without too much pain. Meanwhile, I'm having more issues with the big toe on the same foot -- you know, the toe that I mysteriously busted a year and a half ago. At some point I may need to see a doctor about it because something just isn't right. I hope it won't cause too many problems when I eventually start running again.
Last Week's Goal(s): I think I finally accomplished #2, which was to do some exercise that doesn't involve the toe. I did some exercises in our little swimming pool one day last week. It was a short, simple workout, but it was something.
Next Event Goal: Still planning on the Arlington 9/11 Memorial 5K, though it's looking more and more likely that I'll be walking most of it.
This Week's Goals: (1) Work on a nutrition plan. (2) Walk at least 2x. (3) Do some non-walking exercise.
Analysis: The only thing that has changed really since my last post is my outlook. I think I'm finally starting to get my motivation back, especially now that my toe is doing a lot better. It has happened in a sort of roundabout way though, starting with a moment a couple of weeks ago where I looked at myself in the mirror and decided truly to embrace my curves and see beauty in my body even when it is so far from physically fit. Even though I haven't been driven by a desire to be thin, per se, I also haven't been comfortable in my own skin for a long time. I felt like being obese automatically made me unattractive, even though I didn't see other big women the same way. I just felt like fat didn't look good on me. And now suddenly I'm done seeing myself that way. I don't know what made the difference.
Maybe I tried seeing myself the way my husband sees me -- all through my pregnancies and weight fluctuations over the years, he has never stopped finding me beautiful and telling me so. It just seems silly to waste energy looking for every flaw when I look in the mirror and feeling self-conscious in all of my clothes. I also read an article about how damaging it can be for a daughter to hear a mother call herself fat -- it can end up creating a warped idea of beauty in the daughter's mind. I don't want to do that to my daughter, so I want to start NOW to develop a better body image in my own mind. That way I can pass positive ideas on to my little girl as soon as she's old enough to start picking up on them.
Now that I'm even less motivated by my appearance than ever, it seems like it should be harder to find the drive to lose weight and get in shape, but I think instead I'm just getting even more focused on health. I truly do yearn to be healthy. I want to be able to run and swim and bike (of course), and also hike and roller skate and play around with my kids. I don't want to be at increased risk of various diseases. I want to sleep better, and feel less stressed, and have strong bones that won't start deteriorating in about 10 years. So for all of those reasons, I am ready to really TRY again, to start eating better and getting regular exercise. I started off this new week pretty well, so I'm optimistic!
Tuesday, June 25, 2013
Trying to Try {Weekly Summary}
Weight: 220?
Weekly Change: None
Overall Change: Still at "starting weight" of 220, I think
Next goal weight: 214 (pre-pregnancy weight)
BMI: 32.0 (obese) (using this calculator)
Waist Circumference: 40 inches, I think
Disease Risk: Very High (according to this chart)
Jeans Size: 20
Total Workouts: 0
Total Walks: 0
Total Other Workouts: 0
Progress on Training Plan(s): Currently on hiatus while broken toe heals
Injury Report: The broken toe is still healing slowly. Really slowly. And I'm growing impatient.
Last Week's Goal(s): Still failing....
Next Event Goal: Still planning on the Arlington 9/11 Memorial 5K.
This Week's Goals: Same as last week and maybe I'll actually accomplish them this time: (1) Work on a nutrition plan. (2) Attempt some yoga or some other exercise that doesn't necessarily involve the toe. (3) Get a new battery for my pedometer.
Analysis: I think I need a reboot of some sort. I haven't even been trying to overcome the obstacle of the broken toe. Instead of sketching out a nutrition plan, I've continued to eat whatever I want. I didn't manage to write an update last week, and haven't weighed myself in even longer. For some reason, the word "denial" comes to mind. The problem is I don't know how to snap myself out of it. I'm so busy feeding and taking care of the baby, and trying to spend lots of quality time with my older kids, that I have little time or energy left over for anything else, even something as important as my health. I know that I need to find a better balance eventually, but at the moment I don't feel particularly driven to do so. Even though I re-listed my previous goals for this week, what I'd really like to accomplish is just finding some motivation so that at least I'll start trying again.
A good night's sleep might also help...so if someone wants to notify my sweet baby girl that nursing all night does not fit into my agenda, I'd appreciate it.
Weekly Change: None
Overall Change: Still at "starting weight" of 220, I think
Next goal weight: 214 (pre-pregnancy weight)
BMI: 32.0 (obese) (using this calculator)
Waist Circumference: 40 inches, I think
Disease Risk: Very High (according to this chart)
Jeans Size: 20
Total Workouts: 0
Total Walks: 0
Total Other Workouts: 0
Progress on Training Plan(s): Currently on hiatus while broken toe heals
Injury Report: The broken toe is still healing slowly. Really slowly. And I'm growing impatient.
Last Week's Goal(s): Still failing....
Next Event Goal: Still planning on the Arlington 9/11 Memorial 5K.
This Week's Goals: Same as last week and maybe I'll actually accomplish them this time: (1) Work on a nutrition plan. (2) Attempt some yoga or some other exercise that doesn't necessarily involve the toe. (3) Get a new battery for my pedometer.
Analysis: I think I need a reboot of some sort. I haven't even been trying to overcome the obstacle of the broken toe. Instead of sketching out a nutrition plan, I've continued to eat whatever I want. I didn't manage to write an update last week, and haven't weighed myself in even longer. For some reason, the word "denial" comes to mind. The problem is I don't know how to snap myself out of it. I'm so busy feeding and taking care of the baby, and trying to spend lots of quality time with my older kids, that I have little time or energy left over for anything else, even something as important as my health. I know that I need to find a better balance eventually, but at the moment I don't feel particularly driven to do so. Even though I re-listed my previous goals for this week, what I'd really like to accomplish is just finding some motivation so that at least I'll start trying again.
A good night's sleep might also help...so if someone wants to notify my sweet baby girl that nursing all night does not fit into my agenda, I'd appreciate it.
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